Missing out on the moment

At a recent concert Beyonce got in a fan’s face about his camera use. The fan was recording the concert and Beyonce told him to put it away, expressing to him that she was singing right at him, but he didn’t notice because he wasn’t in the moment. Now, Beyonce may have overreacted, but her message is a good one. Sometimes we are trying so hard to record and capture life that we miss it. We want to capture memories instead of creating moments. Instead of being present we spend our time looking through a lens. Those photos or videos are likely not things we will spend much time looking back at. After all, who needs ten minutes of a third grade class warming up for a spring sing. Aren’t the memories better?

On the afternoon show “The Talk” the hosts shared insight on this topic. They, as mothers, say they have backed away from trying chase every milestone with a camera. They will spend a limited amount of time recording and then they’ll put the camera down or remove their face from the viewfinder. That way they get to enjoy what is going on and they will also have a memento of the occasion in case they do want to view it again. The mothers said those shorter videos are things they go back to more often because they trigger the memories and feelings they had while watching that event.

This discussion applies not only to cameras and recording, but also to nocializers who are on their phone while out with friends. I tend to get annoyed when I’m out with someone and they are consistently on their device. It is offensive. It makes me feel like I am not good enough for their full attention. Or I feel like they think what we’re doing isn’t interesting enough. If Facebook, Twitter, Four Square, etc. are that happening I would rather that person go home and give social media their full attention instead of trying to divide it with me. It doesn’t make me feel bad about myself, but instead I feel like my time is being wasted. I also wonder what is wrong with that person that they can’t enjoy their time and are always looking for something else. A friend introduced me to a new term recently, FOMO—fear of missing out. I think many nocializers have this problem. I think they’re also afraid of socializing. They may think it is easier to live vicariously through our “friends” and “followers” than to actually live our own lives.