A condemned gingerbread house

I get excited at the thought of checking things off my bucket list. After all, I filled mine with fun and very feasible activities and events that I can do now instead of on a rainy day when I am very rich and dying. One item on my list that I just satisfied is making a gingerbread house. I decided to make my confectionary concoction after Christmas in the hopes that I could get a good sale price on a pre-made kit. These things are like Twinkies, they have a shelf life of many years, so I wasn't worried about getting an old kit.

The plan and instructions looked simple enough, and it was the bonus candy edition so that was a plus. I unpacked the parts and set off to work. Lean this wall against that wall and use the icing as a spackle-type of joiner. Actually, the frosting is much like spackle and is gross tasting much in the same way that I expect the construction tool to taste like.

Once the walls are up, it's time to put on the roof. This took a little balancing and maneuvering, but not a hard task. Don't forget more icing spackle to seal the deal.  I filled in some holes and tried to make my icing job look as even or at least as snowy as possible.

Candy time! I set out to decorate the house. Flowers around the eves, gum drops across the top where the roof meets, flavored tootsie rolls for trees. And even a chimney made of regular chocolate tootsie rolls.

Okay, so this was by far not an artistic endeavor. It was mostly humorous as I reflected on how bad this project could turn out looking and how gingerbread men everywhere should be very thankful that my house ended up condemned. By the time I was done decorating, I noticed one of the walls starting to droop a little inward, so I grabbed the spackle and the gumdrops and plugged the gap. Fixed some air leaks here and there with extra candy tarts and frosting and then I decided to call it a day before I added any more damage to the house.

My bucket list never said the house needed to look good, or taste good for that matter. Maybe I will re-try this fun activity in the future, but for now I can at least mark it down in the books as being done.